Social Media Work Issue

[Grotesque]

I have come only to the conscious decision to leave this one - its my first proper job. I've been there ten years so I think its a good run. I've been advised on numerous occasions to leave this job and should have listened. I've had nothing but problems since I've been there. I have never actually left a job. I've had a temp job before but left because the contract ran out. Thanks mate. I'm sure there will be light at the end of the tunnel. Fingers crossed.

 

See that's what sort of got me- one of those other threads said you'd been there (somewhere) nine years- and I thought- blimey- same one?! You need to GTF OUT mate it sounds like some sort of roller coaster without the fun stuff (women's bras falling off etc)

[robinsky]

see that's what sort oof got me- one of those other threads said you'd been there (somewhere) nine years- and I thought- blimey- same one?! You need to GTF OUT mate it sounds like some sort of roller coaster without the fun stuff (women's bras falling off etc)

That's one way of looking at it - its never been an easy ride, there, at all.

[smokejumper]

Hey Grot , where do I find THAT ride, sounds like therapy right there ;-)

[robinsky]

I'm not disrespecting the complainant, but I've spoken to my T.U. and HR and they have said about the first comment:

 

1) It is not serious enough as there was no threat/violence/sexual advance/intent

 

In regards to the other comment I worried about, I was told

 

1) You cannot be guilty of harassment over an opinion

 

Therefore, as far as I am concerned, I have nothing to feel guilty about, even if I had written the comments. Just been a complete nightmare and the sooner I am out of my job, the better all round.

 

Been messed around so much here and I'll never forgive them for hitting rock bottom and having suicidal thoughts and what I find so disappointing is that my super is no angel either and she's the one who made the complaint. Maybe this is all a blessing so I can move on and find a better job since my current one just wasn't working out. I've been there ten years, so whilst it might seem bleak, there is always light at the end of the tunnel. I'm not the first and sadly, won't be the last.

[Ellenor001]

Long time lurker and maybe this won't help but I was moved to register on this one and I think your TU and HR are blowing smoke out of their backsides. If they have said this to you it is complete rubbish. You may not be guilty of harassment for an opinion (and actually you could be), but you can be sacked for an opinion. I can think of a lot of opinions that would get me sacked at work. You certainly can be sacked for an opinion. And definitely is you posted that opinion on a social media site. It depends what the opinion is. Don't think your TU are experts, don't think your HR are experts. There are no experts or if there are they are your employers. If the employer thinks your opinion is objectionable that is all it requires.

 

 

if you are ready to move on and want to put this behind you then do it. But do not for one instant think that you can post your opinions about work on social media sites and get away with it. If you do it won't be the last time you are moving on. If you have something to say about your employer/ employment either say it to them or don't say it at all. Posting opinions about anything to do with your employment or work colleagues on social media is the fastest way to get sacked these days.

[honeybee13]

Long time lurker and maybe this won't help but I was moved to register on this one and I think your TU and HR are blowing smoke out of their backsides. If they have said this to you it is complete rubbish. You may not be guilty of harassment for an opinion (and actually you could be), but you can be sacked for an opinion. I can think of a lot of opinions that would get me sacked at work. You certainly can be sacked for an opinion. And definitely is you posted that opinion on a social media site. It depends what the opinion is. Don't think your TU are experts, don't think your HR are experts. There are no experts or if there are they are your employers. If the employer thinks your opinion is objectionable that is all it requires.

 

 

if you are ready to move on and want to put this behind you then do it. But do not for one instant think that you can post your opinions about work on social media sites and get away with it. If you do it won't be the last time you are moving on. If you have something to say about your employer/ employment either say it to them or don't say it at all. Posting opinions about anything to do with your employment or work colleagues on social media is the fastest way to get sacked these days.

 

Hello Ellenor, welcome to CAG.

 

Those are quite strong opinions you've cited. As you're new and this issue is sensitive to robinsky, are you able to tell us what experience you have of this sort of thing please?

 

My best, HB

[Ellenor001]

Hello Ellenor, welcome to CAG.

 

Those are quite strong opinions you've cited. As you're new and this issue is sensitive to robinsky, are you able to tell us what experience you have of this sort of thing please?

 

My best, HB

 

Hello honeybee. Yes my friend got sacked, and honest it wasn't me, for posting stuff that mentioned an opinion about a work colleague not by name but seriously you could tell who it was if you knew. and not mentioning the employer, on facebook and it wasn't even obvious to me who she was on her page, if you know what I mean. It was hard to know it was her. Or I thought it was. She denied it obviously but she got sacked and she made a claim to an industrial tribunal and she lost because they agreed with her employer that they thought it was her. Like I said I have been lurking on here for a bit because its interesting, and some other places too and I hear a lot of the I got sacked because of what I put on facebook. I don't want to upset robinsky and I don't know about his or her employer or problems but I wanted to warn them to keep quiet like the monkeys. Its sometimes better to know nothing and have no opinions. I think this person decided to move on and its probably best for them if they are so unhappy like they said but I didn't want them to do the same thing again and get into trouble. I wont say anything about work on facebook now not even I had a good day or a bad day because you don't know who is watching.By the way it was a friend of my friend that reported her to the manager, it wasn't like the employer went looking or anything.

[robinsky]

Hello honeybee. Yes my friend got sacked, and honest it wasn't me, for posting stuff that mentioned an opinion about a work colleague not by name but seriously you could tell who it was if you knew. and not mentioning the employer, on facebook and it wasn't even obvious to me who she was on her page, if you know what I mean. It was hard to know it was her. Or I thought it was. She denied it obviously but she got sacked and she made a claim to an industrial tribunal and she lost because they agreed with her employer that they thought it was her. Like I said I have been lurking on here for a bit because its interesting, and some other places too and I hear a lot of the I got sacked because of what I put on facebook. I don't want to upset robinsky and I don't know about his or her employer or problems but I wanted to warn them to keep quiet like the monkeys. Its sometimes better to know nothing and have no opinions. I think this person decided to move on and its probably best for them if they are so unhappy like they said but I didn't want them to do the same thing again and get into trouble. I wont say anything about work on facebook now not even I had a good day or a bad day because you don't know who is watching.By the way it was a friend of my friend that reported her to the manager, it wasn't like the employer went looking or anything.

 

Hi there - this is a very interesting case. As far as I am concerned, without being disrespectful to the situation, I trust in what my HR and Union say to me, but really by now, I've lost the will to fight because its drained so much out of me. Work turned around and said to me on more than one occasion it wasn't serious enough to warrant dismissal and only a twelve month warning - also, my T.U. rep said that looking at the pattern of the comments, it was down to two other people involved in the conversation who were causing trouble and nothing to do with anything attributed to my name. I understand what you mean to keep quiet about who knows who etc. However, I need all the support I can get right now. I have made the conscious decision to move on now because my happiness comes first and when it comes down to it, its only a job and I was unhappy there anyway so maybe this is the kickstart I need to find another position elsewhere. Things hadn't been right in my job for a long time. I often wondered how the comments I supposedly made got to the line manager because the complainant was fine with me and all of a sudden, made an excuse to leave the office and then never saw her again and no explanation was ever given as to why she was working in another office, either. I have learned a lot from this and know that even though I had nothing to do with the comments, that I am very careful only to post trivial things on Facebook, as I did anyway.

[Ellenor001]

Hi there - this is a very interesting case. As far as I am concerned, without being disrespectful to the situation, I trust in what my HR and Union say to me, but really by now, I've lost the will to fight because its drained so much out of me. Work turned around and said to me on more than one occasion it wasn't serious enough to warrant dismissal and only a twelve month warning - also, my T.U. rep said that looking at the pattern of the comments, it was down to two other people involved in the conversation who were causing trouble and nothing to do with anything attributed to my name. I understand what you mean to keep quiet about who knows who etc. However, I need all the support I can get right now. I have made the conscious decision to move on now because my happiness comes first and when it comes down to it, its only a job and I was unhappy there anyway so maybe this is the kickstart I need to find another position elsewhere. Things hadn't been right in my job for a long time. I often wondered how the comments I supposedly made got to the line manager because the complainant was fine with me and all of a sudden, made an excuse to leave the office and then never saw her again and no explanation was ever given as to why she was working in another office, either. I have learned a lot from this and know that even though I had nothing to do with the comments, that I am very careful only to post trivial things on Facebook, as I did anyway.

 

 

Hello and I hope that you weren't upset by what I said because I didn't mean to upset you. It was obvious that you are not happy at work and I am sorry but I didn't know about what problem you had before. If I read it before I don't remember it like some people here do. I didn't want to interfere but because of my friend I know it is really easy to get sacked for sayingstuff that isn't really that serious, or I didn't think it was that serious. OK maybe to get a warning or something but not sacked. It wasn't, like you said, a threat and it wasn't racist or anything like that. If I was really telling the truth she said what was true about tis person and we all think it, but that didn't help. I know because we work for the same employer and I know who she was talking about.

 

 

I am really sorry if I talked out of turn and I think maybe that I did because honeybee said that they were strong opinions and I didn't mean to hurt you. I don't know what you said but in my experience it doesn't matter what you said. The best thing is to just keep quiet and you seemed to be so unhappy that I just wanted to say it is better to stick your head down and say and do nothing, because if you want a new job and that is fine with you then you can start over again. Best not to even think about making another same mistake again even if you didn't really do anything much wrong.

[robinsky]

Ellenor001, I want to make it clear that you did not upset me. In fact, I found your advice interesting and wise, as well as the case you presented, which was equally as so. I've had many problems at my work, which honeybee and emmzzii will testify to. You are definitely not interfering, so don't worry about that - I appreciate all advice. Yes, social media has become a real outlet for trouble, these days. The comments on my FB page were not that serious and even work said that too, according to my father. They also said my job was not under threat as well, so all things I could use against them if it came to that - I just want to move on, now. The conscious decision has been made.

 

Precisely. There was no threat/sexual advance/violence/intent in the comments. Like you say, agreeing with an opinion is not harassment, but if work can fire you for that, its ridiculous. Also, I was told it would help my case that the comments were removed. As soon as I saw them, I removed them immediately from my time line - this would add clarification that no offence was meant, if I had made the comments or not. You have to be so careful with social media.

 

I don't think you spoke out of turn at all - I feel strongly for what's happened because of how work made me feel - I had suicidal thoughts/contemplations - something I will never forgive the workplace or the complainant for. I don't care about the comments anymore. There was nothing there - I would be more inclined to panic if any of the comments carried a threat etc. I was told an opinion would not be deemed harassment and work are looking at the situation a serious misconduct. Apparently, it went to the police but they weren't interested - not serious enough. Tells its own story. If work are supposed to treat social media like a workplace situation, then they should give an employee a stern warning that any behaviour should not be tolerated and if they repeat it, then take action.

 

I have many things going in my favour - I know when people say T.U. reps aren't experts but other people's advice and theirs has convinced me that the comments were something and nothing that just appeared on my timeline. I think this happened for a reason, as I believe in fate. I was unhappy in my job, so maybe this is the kick I need to get out and find a job where people give more of a concern into what they are doing to try and work towards the greater cause.

 

Have a good evening! Kind Regards to you and welcome to the consumer forums.

[Emmzzi]

you really sound like you are in a much better place now you have taken control back. Very pleased for you! Next up I hope you are having a wee holiday, and then we want to know how the hunt for the next job, study, volunteering whatever, goes!

[Ellenor001]

Ellenor001, I want to make it clear that you did not upset me. In fact, I found your advice interesting and wise, as well as the case you presented, which was equally as so. I've had many problems at my work, which honeybee and emmzzii will testify to. You are definitely not interfering, so don't worry about that - I appreciate all advice. Yes, social media has become a real outlet for trouble, these days. The comments on my FB page were not that serious and even work said that too, according to my father. They also said my job was not under threat as well, so all things I could use against them if it came to that - I just want to move on, now. The conscious decision has been made.

 

Precisely. There was no threat/sexual advance/violence/intent in the comments. Like you say, agreeing with an opinion is not harassment, but if work can fire you for that, its ridiculous. Also, I was told it would help my case that the comments were removed. As soon as I saw them, I removed them immediately from my time line - this would add clarification that no offence was meant, if I had made the comments or not. You have to be so careful with social media.

 

I don't think you spoke out of turn at all - I feel strongly for what's happened because of how work made me feel - I had suicidal thoughts/contemplations - something I will never forgive the workplace or the complainant for. I don't care about the comments anymore. There was nothing there - I would be more inclined to panic if any of the comments carried a threat etc. I was told an opinion would not be deemed harassment and work are looking at the situation a serious misconduct. Apparently, it went to the police but they weren't interested - not serious enough. Tells its own story. If work are supposed to treat social media like a workplace situation, then they should give an employee a stern warning that any behaviour should not be tolerated and if they repeat it, then take action.

 

I have many things going in my favour - I know when people say T.U. reps aren't experts but other people's advice and theirs has convinced me that the comments were something and nothing that just appeared on my timeline. I think this happened for a reason, as I believe in fate. I was unhappy in my job, so maybe this is the kick I need to get out and find a job where people give more of a concern into what they are doing to try and work towards the greater cause.

 

Have a good evening! Kind Regards to you and welcome to the consumer forums.

 

 

That is really kind of you to say but I think I don't really have much else to say that could help people. I only joined because I really felt bad about what you were saying and my friend heard it all, as in it wasn't really serious so she should just admit it and stuff like that. It isn't that I don't think you are right about what should happen but it is sort of scary that that doesn't seem to be what the law says about these things. My friend worked for our employer for 17 years and she never got into any trouble and it is a council so people say they are more understanding and not nasty like other employers. She has never done anything wrong before, and she never had any time off sick or any excuse to sack her. If I tell the truth then what she said was true but stupid. I wouldn't have dared say it to anyone's face but yes, we all said it behind her back. I don't think my friend thought for one minute about what she said on facebook or that maybe her friends weren't really friends in that way.

 

 

I really really hope that you find a good job and one that makes you happy. Nobody should think about killing themselves over a job because no job is worth that. But when you find that job just be careful. You don't have to make mistakes to learn from them. It doesn't matter really whether you did wrong or not as long as you don't end up in the same place again. You are a kind person but sometimes that makes it easy just to get at you.

[robinsky]

you really sound like you are in a much better place now you have taken control back. Very pleased for you! Next up I hope you are having a wee holiday, and then we want to know how the hunt for the next job, study, volunteering whatever, goes!

 

I am not going to jump into the job search straight away - I'm not sure if I want to work for someone, as opposed to working for myself. Therefore, I'm going to give serious consideration to self employment and if there's nothng there for me, move onto outside jobs. I know not all jobs in the real world are bad, but having had a bad experience, its hard to think 100% logically at the moment. I have got financial security for now so that helps matters enormously. Just waiting for that email or letter from work - if they don't agree the severance, then I'll submit my resignation before they fire me and tell my GP that work is untenable to go back to. My one main fear was that my GP wouldn't prescribe me a doctor's note - I'm not fully over my anxiety yet. I had another mild episode today. It comes and goes. The more I think about work and what may happen, the worse it gets. However, now the conscious decision has been made, hopefully that'll put me on the road to 100% recovery. I will keep you informed of how things go in the aftermath and the job hunt. Thanks for all your sound support.

[robinsky]

Hi,

 

I'm just writing to let you know that I have had a lot of thought over the weekend and have made a conscious decision to hand in my letter of resignation.

 

Interestingly, during the week, work called me and told me that they didn't want to lose me but going back there, I would be doing a disservice to myself and it wouldn't be the same, regardless, as well as subjecting myself to a multitude of problems, time and time again. Best for a fresh start, I think, now. I'm not sure if the phone call was an act of desperation on their part, or otherwise.

 

Of all the things I've been through and being mucked around so badly by work and my trade union, I don't have much loyalty to my work now, especially since the incident had such a major impact on my mental health and being advised, perhaps unwisely, that the consequences of my actions, depending on what the comments were, could result in criminal penalties - welfare are supposed to be there to support you, not send you into a blind panic. It was because of this that I begun to have suicidal thoughts/contemplation - the thought of a civil suit also terrified me and it wasn't until my T.U. reassured me that I begun to relax.

 

When I went back to work initially in February, I was supposed to have a welcome back meeting but this did not happen - they were more concerned in putting me in a temporary position - which I hated, since they gave me so little to do. I had to chase them up so I could get things to do, which is wrong.

 

My first T.U. rep was useful until he broke policy and my second T.U. rep just said he couldn't help me anymore, which was great. I've been through my T.U. again but they never got back to me - so poor. Work have hardly been in touch to ask how I am etc. Just really bad.

 

I can't really forgive work for all of this, especially in light of the fact of a situation they have admitted wasn't that serious and one minute, they're saying its not job threatening, then they say its unlikely and now, they say again its not going to result in me losing my job. Talk about playing games with your mind. As someone else said as well, if I went back, I could never be sure of whose watching you in retaliation for what happened, people's opinions changing and their attitude toward you etc. I can't be bothering myself with that type of aggravation.

 

Therefore, I am going to send in my letter of resignation to work and sort it all out once and for all next week - I am going to look at self employed options first and then move on from that. I am not so keen to put myself back in an office environment, quite so soon. I need a winding down period as this has had a serious effect on my mental health and want to rebuild myself again. I believe going back would just, as others have said, bring me down again and I'm not prepared to revisit that place again. My main concern was a civil suit but knowing that's not going to happen, I'm happy. I mean, I never had much faith in the job in the last few years so losing my job or facing a worst case scenario of dismissal is hardly the end of the world.

 

Thank you for all of your help in this matter.

[Sidewinder]

Hi robinsky

 

I have merged this post with your most recent thread so that readers are able to look at it as an update, and in context with, the problems which you have been having

[Grotesque]

Ellenor's views on social networking sites are spot on. People nowadays oft-times think that because it's 'the internet' it 's therefore not 'real life'- but of course it's no different to a newspaper or other media. Bottom line: don't say anything on FB you wouldn't say to someone's face, whether it's personal or corporate...

[robinsky]

By and large, it doesn't matter now because I have decided to leave and hand in my letter of resignation - also, work, as I have stated in another thread, contacted me and told me the situation wasn't that serious and wanted me to come back - can't be that bad, then!

 

However, with the hell I've been through, I can't forgive them for it and going back will open myself up to other problems, besides the one I am currently facing at the moment.

 

All the advice I have had, has been sound and all comes to the same conclusion - if I left, it wouldn't be the end of the world and 10 years is a commendable service - I've never had an easy ride since I've been there. Too many problems there now for me to be bothered going back, in all truth.

 

Also, the person who hacked my account would have taken measures to ensure that they covered their tracks and if they're experienced, then it wouldn't be too difficult to pin the blame on someone else.

 

Now onto finding another job.

 

I agree about social media, which is why I am very careful about what I write.

[Shendor]

So today was the day - have you handed in your notice or was it just another attention seeking cry for help? Hope you found the strength to follow through with what all your posts have been about for the last 3 years, and now you can look forward to moving on with your life.

 

(EDIT: I just read that back and it sounds harsher than I meant it too. No disrespect intended, but I've been reading your threads and it seems like you knew what you had to do years ago, but still haven't done it. How come?) Best, Sx

[robinsky]

So today was the day - have you handed in your notice or was it just another attention seeking cry for help? Hope you found the strength to follow through with what all your posts have been about for the last 3 years, and now you can look forward to moving on with your life.

 

(EDIT: I just read that back and it sounds harsher than I meant it too. No disrespect intended, but I've been reading your threads and it seems like you knew what you had to do years ago, but still haven't done it. How come?) Best, Sx

 

I am waiting for work to send in a letter to do with my investigation and then send in my letter of resignation with that - I haven't received the letter yet so its a waiting game.

 

Yes I am looking forward to moving on, now. Over the course of three years, it has been a very mixed bag - just problems, etc. It wasn't quite as straightforward as handing in my letter of resignation because things got better etc. and I thought that's that and it was very much up and down.

 

To be honest, I always think you know what you have to do - its about having the moral courage of doing it - at the end of the day, back then, it was a job, money coming in etc. It was tolerable whilst things were fluctuating between good and bad and perhaps that was part of me seeking a cry for help, I don't know, but now I know what I have to do - this has been a step too far and has had a poor effect on my health and wellbeing.

 

No job is worth that and I made the conscious decision over the weekend to leave my job - as I say, its just a waiting game on their part now.

 

I reviewed the comments I supposedly made and even work said its not serious, so why put me through all this aggravation, including suicidal thoughts/contemplation? That's not acceptable in my view. So yes, now is the time to go forward and ten years is a good run.

 

The thing is, as a final thought, sometimes things in your job and taking that step forward isn't quite as straightforward as it seems, even if to you it seems like the rational thing to do....

[Grotesque]

...i bet it's not a final thought lol...

[Shendor]

Hmmmm, now I understand. Have you ever thought about starting a blog and writing about how you feel, as it's clear you don't need advice as you know what to do but keep procrastinating and justifying reasons not to do it. Which is all fine and your right of course. But it's also clear you need people to listen: Venting our annoyances and feelings, especially when to do with work or relationships and the minutiae of life, is good and healthy. Maybe try it?

[Grotesque]

Indeed, Shannondore speaks wisely. It is the first step towards writing a boook these days- the positive side of social networking, eh!!!

[Emmzzi]

I vote for giving robinsky some peace and quiet to reflect now; I am not sure we are all helping!

[citizenB]

I vote for giving robinsky some peace and quiet to reflect now; I am not sure we are all helping!

 

In view of Emmzzi's accurate observation, I am closing this thread.