Distress Order Advice Want Belongings Back Off Ex-Partner

[Laura Cooke]

advice on retrieving personal belongings from ex partners home ignoring communication

 

daughter left her partners private rented home in January she took what she could when she left all efforts to collect rest of her items have been ignored texts and calls go unanswered.

 

daughters ex partner does not work used to be home all day now he is going to his parents all day till late evening to prevent daughter catching him in

 

daughter as left him a ready made home as she works she was happy to set herself up again all she wants are her personal belongings some have sentimental value

 

read about a distress order can any one advise what she can do to get her things back she even suggested to him to leave her belongings outside and text to say he as done so if he doesn`t want to meet her but all suggestions are ignored

[ukaviator]

Hi Laura

 

She could ask the local Police to accompany her to the property at a certain time and date, although it is a civil matter. Failing that a strong letter from a Solicitor may help move things along.

[Laura Cooke]

Thanks for quick response it`s catching him in hese delibaretly going out all day so you can`t catch him in I have emailed a solicitor as most want a serious amount of money just for a letter as daughter works and can`t get legal aid we thought he`d appreciate that she as kindly left him everything in the house all of what she as purchased all she wanted was her personal items and he not playing ball

[ukaviator]

Still have a word with the local Police. They may meet up with your sister when you know he is definately in the house. Does she still have a key?

[Laura Cooke]

My daughter wasn`t a joint tenant she had key to front door he`s bolted this from inside and he now leaves through the back door she as key to shed where her patio furniture is and her bike

Edited June 21, 2011 by Laura Cooke

[ashmk]

he's

[ukaviator]

Any news Laura?

[Laura Cooke]

Well Daughter as carried on texting ex partner to see if he can give her a suitable time to collect her things but as had no response, then today my Daughter noticed his Mothers vehicle at the property so took her chance and called at the property, his Mother passed her a fair few black bags with items in but none had the main items she wants.

 

My Daughter as an appointment to see solicitor Monday to see if they will send him a letter as my Daughter wants this sorted and a line drawing under it she left him in January her ex partner is trying to hang on to things so he still as a hold on her life it is getting her down. She only wants personal items like she as said if she wanted to be ruthless she could ask for 3/4 of the house as she as receipts for everything she purchased and she purchased majority of fixtures and furnishings but had no qualm about him retaining these items as like she said he as not done anything the relationship just broke down and she didn`t think it fair to then take everything back she had purchased as that would be cruel.

 

She as been very patient and understanding but he is being so immature and out of order, we have no idea when we will catch him at home again, today was a one off and he ignores contact from my Daughter it`s a headache my Daughter could do without, think this is the cause of her ill health lately. My Daughter as been left near on 6 months enough is enough

[tomtubby]

The "Distress Order" that you are talking about is probably a Distress Warrant and this is only available for the police or bailiff to enforce and is in relation to an unpaid court fine.

[Laura Cooke]

Got this of another site apparently you can use the distress warrant to retrieve your personal belongings

 

"You do not always need a solicitor. I would advise writing a letter listing the property you would like back, warning him that you will be taking this matter to court if it is not rectified. Send it via recorded delivery as well.

If you hear nothing in 2 weeks, write another letter via recorded delivery. That way when you take him to court you show reasonablness and a willing to deal with things without making it a civil matter. Express you would rather have your property back. In that case a judge will award you with a distress warrant, where you will be accompanied back to the property to remove it if he has not returned it you in its last fit state within 14 days.

I know this because thats what I did! Its was a real shock for my ex when he came home (he didn't show up at court or answer any of the letters from me or from the court with the distress warrant!) We entered the property and removed everything right down to the hand towels in the bathroom"

[Laura Cooke]

Daughters solicitor said she was just within the scope to get legal aid as her income just under the threshold. Solicitor as wrote to daughters ex partner outlining the items she wants and to allow her access to the home. If he ignores this she suggested seeing a mediator, if he ignores the request for the personal belongings surely he would also ignore a request to go to a mediator. The ex partner is being non compliant and obstructive as he wants to keep a hold on my daughter keeping her personal belongings gives him power.

 

Solicitor happy to take it to small claims court failing any compliance from the ex partner

[Laura Cooke]

Ex partner as had the solicitors letter and as not been in touch, he as bumped into my daughter in law today and as said he put all my daughters belongings out on the back of his house 3 weeks ago and texted my daughter to let her know.

 

He as never once texted my daughter he says the items were all stolen my daughter in law asked him why he didn`t call the police if this was the case he said he didn`t think. I am furious just knew he would pull this stunt hese tried every trick in the book to prevent my daughter getting her personal belongings.

 

Read on internet that the ex partner who as got the goods must remain care taker of the goods failure to do so will result in him having to reimburse her for the items, I have no doubt these goods will still be in his home or he as sold them:-x

[BRIGADIER2JCS]

Indeed he has a common duty of care to ''preserve'' her property

from damage or theft.

[ploddertom]

Maybe she should repeat this at the local nick but suggest he has stolen them himself and hope they make a visit to him.

 

PT

[Laura Cooke]

Thanks for the input really appreciate it my daughter is very upset the solicitor promised to send my daughter a copy of the letter she was sending the ex partner but she hasn`t so we no idea what she said to him, surely the solicitor should have pointed out that he had a duty to take care of the items and pointed out his position if he didn`t take care of them.

 

I considered ringing the police today because as far as I am concerned hese stolen them knowing how he operates hese probably removed them to his new girl friends house so should anyone come my daughters goods would not be found on his premises.

 

Basically the solicitor pointing out the list of items my daughter wanted just gave him the opportuniy to hide/sell the items so far the solicitor done my daughter no favours, my daughter is in debt still and paying it for some of the items she naturally wants back.

 

Other than ring solicitor again tomorrow I have no idea what the next move is as we could not realistically tell police what is missing/stolen/hidden as we have no idea what the solicitor as stated in the letter to him without a copy of this letter which she promised to forward to my daughter but hasn`t.

 

I personally would like police to visit the ex partner and for him to purge himself by blatantly lying that my daughters goods have been stolen from the back of his house, I would think that the police would want to know why he never reported this another thought as just dawned on me how does he know they were stolen he as today told my daughter in law that he texted my daughter 3 week ago to say her goods were at the back of the house, now if he did indeed put them out and text my daughter how does he know that it wasn`t my daughter that actually came and collected them!!!!! he just came out with it that they were stolen.

 

Any advice would be gratefully received my daughter so run down by all this unreasonable behaviour no need for it at all she been good enough to leave majority of fixtures and furniture she as paid for and the ex partner still wants to hurt her.

 

She as left her dishwasher, dining table and chairs, bed, bedroom furniture, fridge freezer, wall unit, shed, (Fitted kitchen she had a loan for) my daughter was happy for him to have these items and rebuy these things sooner than be cruel and leave him without much furniture as he is unemployed and hese still not played ball with her all she as asked for his her bike which I won her in a competition, her christmas tree and trimmings which she as added to yearly quite expensive, her garden patio set which she only purchased last year, and her dogs toys and some nick nacks, hese not worked in the 10 years they have been together my daughter spent thousands on him and the house and the garden.

Edited July 24, 2011 by Laura Cooke

[BRIGADIER2JCS]

If she cannot get access to the property

she may have no alternative other than the police,

she should tell them that she fears a breach of the peace

if she tries to recover her property.

[ploddertom]

she should tell them that she fears a breach of the peace

 

And/or violence although I hope not.

 

PT

[Laura Cooke]

Access to what property? he states he put it out and it`s all been stolen strange rang solicitors she didn`t send letter till 11th July he told my daughter in law he put the goods out 3 week ago how would he have known what to put out at that time and how does he not know that my daughter did in fact collect the items if he supposedly texted her, why is he saying the goods were stolen?

 

rang soilicitors today the solicitor is on holiday till a week a monday so got in to see one of their solicitors in the town, asked them what they said in the letter to the ex partner as they did not send my daughter a copy as promised they basically just gave him a list of items my daughter wanted and asked him to make arrangements for my daughter to be able to collect them, I would have thought that the solicitor might have added some advice to the ex partner should he decide to dispose of the goods hence he as done.

 

I am calling at the police station soon but feel they will say it`s a civil matter see your solicitor I have no idea when we would catch the ex partner in as he as played this cat and mouse game since my daughter left we only caught him by accident a few weeks ago and his mother passed through the door black bags of rubbish really nothing of any interest to my daughter, if police went down it probably would be frutile as he as probably removed all my daughters goods to another location same thing as his brother did when his wife left him.

 

No idea what the next move is but in no circumstances do I want him to be allowed to get away with this. It`s theft in my eyes.

[BRIGADIER2JCS]

The breach of the peace, statement will get plod interested, and it

would I feel be better for her to be accompanied if she does get access.

[Laura Cooke]

More than happy to have the police however we may be wasting their time for them to come and get access to find nothing in the house that my daughter is after as the ex as removed them, they say people do this to avoid baliffs taking things how under handed.

 

Wish now on hind sight that when my daughter spotted him in a few weeks ago that she didn`t ring the police then and take everything it wouldn`t have mattered if it was all on the street I would have got help to move it.

[wonkeydonkey]

This is not complicated..............Your daughter must arrange transport to accommodate any of the goods she wishes to reclaim from the house then go to the police station nearest to her home and tell them she is going to the house to get her belongings but fears her partner will cause a breach of the peace and that she feels his hostility may cause him to be violent to her,she must take a copy of the solicitors letter sent to her partner to verify he is holding goods belonging to her.

 

Do not make mention of what has been said to your daughter in law, the police will be able to question him further if he maintains his story the goods have been stolen. If he wishes to dig a hole by lying to the police then let him do so and if your daughter suspects he has removed the goods and hidden them elsewhere it is at this point she speaks up in front of the accompanying officers.

 

I have been at this junction and speak from personal experience.

 

Hope this helps.

 

WD

[BRIGADIER2JCS]

Good advice WD.

[Laura Cooke]

Thanks for the advice will be sorting something soon after seeing another solicitor on Wednesday been to police today as we suspected can`t help unless you want them to come by if collecting belongings, he is under no legal obligation to let anyone into the house and I can bet you diamonds he won`t hese a arrogant person. Appreciate this sounds simples if only you not met this idiot wish my daughter never had

[Laura Cooke]

Well other solicitor said can`t get legal aid to go to small claims court and she is only allowed to say certain things in her letter to the ex partner told her had she worded it that he is caretaker of the goods and that his partner could take it to the small claims should he not return the goods or take care of them then it might not have brought about him saying the goods had been left outside and stolen.

 

She said she would write and tell him he`d acted wreckless in leaving the alledged goods outside as he was told that my daughter would need to be allowed to have access to the home to claim her goods.

 

She said she would tell him that failure to hand over the goods or the cash value of them that she would advise that my daughter intends to take the matter to the small claims court.

 

If this doesn`t work don`t know what will but I am sure he still as my daughters belongings in the home as a relative saw the barbecue only a few days ago.

 

The solicitor said a criminal matter as been brought about by the ex partner alledging the goods have been stolen so she said the police should have been involved and should make a visit however when we called to the police station we got no further than the enquiry desk run it past them and they said it was a civil matter.

[wonkeydonkey]

I have experienced this exact same scenario and have helped numerous others with the same, past experiences show the only people to benefit from solicitors letters passing to and fro are the Solicitors themselves, by way of the fee's they charge. It ceases to be a civil matter when a" breach of the peace " becomes a possibility. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain in following post #21 if you wish to stop this dragging on for months to come and avoid further solicitors costs Alternatively, for approx £80 you can resolve the matter in the small claims court without the need of a solicitor.

 

Good Luck

WD