Why are replies on the post trying to argue with what you say

[Guest wino]

thanks SOD'EM, i like your sense of humour, lol.

 

Please, please, please do not encourage him

[totiesquoties]

love your picture monkey

[totiesquoties]

another point is just because you are NEW to the cag forum, does not mean you do not know anything, quite the contrary

[ErikaPNP]

another point is just because you are NEW to the cag forum, does not mean you do not know anything, quite the contrary

 

This is absolutely correct. I initially came here seeking help with an issue I knew nothing about. But I stayed on to give help on another area of the forum that I am knowledgable about. Been here ever since!

[kiptower]

similar with me Erika got an answer withing a day , was sorted and dusted, but enjoy helping others now etc,

 

Kip

[silverfox1961]

Morning all,

 

I have this simple philosophy,"Treat others as you would expect others to treat you."

 

I have never gone on to a thread and said bluntly "You are wrong."

I tend to put something like, "with respect, I disagree." and then go on to explain why I disagree. That saves a lot of argument and if someone does start up, it's dead easy to ignore them

Don't rise to the bait is all I say

[totiesquoties]

yes i have read some of your posts, and you do give great help, well done!

[locutus]

Morning all,

 

I have this simple philosophy,"Treat others as you would expect others to treat you."

 

I have never gone on to a thread and said bluntly "You are wrong."

I tend to put something like, "with respect, I disagree." and then go on to explain why I disagree. That saves a lot of argument and if someone does start up, it's dead easy to ignore them

Don't rise to the bait is all I say

 

The thing is, the people who "bait" the others are masters of it!

[Bookworm]

Morning all,

 

I have this simple philosophy,"Treat others as you would expect others to treat you."

 

I have never gone on to a thread and said bluntly "You are wrong."

I tend to put something like, "with respect, I disagree." and then go on to explain why I disagree. That saves a lot of argument and if someone does start up, it's dead easy to ignore them

Don't rise to the bait is all I say

 

Mine is slightly different, and it is: Treat others as you would want others to treat you. If they don't, then the gloves are off.

 

The 2 people I am thinking of are people who I first spoke to the way I normally would, politely disagreed, explained why. All I got in return was nastiness, personal attacks etc... I put up with it once, 2 times, 3 times... No more. These people's egoes are so huge that if you say "I disagree", they see it as personal affront anyway and they will try to hammer you to the ground while the poor OP is wondering what the hell is going on. So yes, in these particular 2 cases, I do say: Wrong. And I say why. And in all fairness (for I am only human), I do enjoy it. And because I have seen them do it to so many people, I don't feel bad about it at all. TBH, it doesn't even make a dent in their egoes anyway.

 

As you say, Loquito, them baiters are dead good at it, and not everyone can stand up to them, so yes, if I come across another one of their bullying posts, I step in and try and stop them.

[kiptower]

and your 100% correct in doing this Bookie, and I have the greatest respect for you when you do it, I have seen your replies to bring the OP post back on the right track where the persons that are mentioned are waffling on about the rights and wrongs they think it, ( not the true facts but their version which is often not correct advise to give ) and is many times not helping the OP rather taking the other side and scaring the OP away feeling guilty, I too have a few run in's with similar people trying to steer the OP down the wrong road, even when the true fact have been posted, the battle often will continue , the mr perfects will never admit they gave wrong advice.

[SOD'EM]

the mr perfects will never admit they gave wrong advice.

 

Yes I will:cool:

[kiptower]

no you wont , you would post it with pics :|

[SOD'EM]

Or say it with

 

[Bookworm]

Bang goes another sensible thread...

[silverfox1961]

Another reason I don't get into arguments is that it tends to detract from the OP's dilemma.

 

In the good old days we just went behind the bike sheds and sorted it it that way.

 

I don't think a virtual 2x4 will have the same effect

 

If we had a thread which we could link to when the language gets "fruity" then off we go to that thread and carry on the argument in a place that doesn't hijack a thread.

[Bookworm]

I have been known to ask the site team to move part of the threads to the Bear Garden precisely for that purpose, SF.

[totiesquoties]

Mine is slightly different, and it is: Treat others as you would want others to treat you. If they don't, then the gloves are off.

 

The 2 people I am thinking of are people who I first spoke to the way I normally would, politely disagreed, explained why. All I got in return was nastiness, personal attacks etc... I put up with it once, 2 times, 3 times... No more. These people's egoes are so huge that if you say "I disagree", they see it as personal affront anyway and they will try to hammer you to the ground while the poor OP is wondering what the hell is going on. So yes, in these particular 2 cases, I do say: Wrong. And I say why. And in all fairness (for I am only human), I do enjoy it. And because I have seen them do it to so many people, I don't feel bad about it at all. TBH, it doesn't even make a dent in their egoes anyway.

 

As you say, Loquito, them baiters are dead good at it, and not everyone can stand up to them, so yes, if I come across another one of their bullying posts, I step in and try and stop them.

 

thanks bookworm, now we are getting to the crux of the matter, yes it did feel like BULLYING to me,

and i have encountered exactly what you say above, also i thought the same about the poor OP, what must they be thinking when you are giving good advice, and then someone steps in takes it to a whole new level o argument, you are very right and very sensible what you say, because i experience just that, i did answer back as i was not going to be bullied, but i was polite, straight to the point too, but i must confess i did not think that is what this site is about, there are far more serious things at stake sometimes, and although it might spice things up for someone who is experiencing a dull day, i do think this website is definitely not the place for it, you do talk buckets load of sense, and i like your outlook. thanks you for saying it exactly as it is.

[totiesquoties]

or say it with

 

 

or, and or, that is beautiful, cheered me up anyway, lovely, and cuddly.

[totiesquoties]

another reason i don't get into arguments is that it tends to detract from the op's dilemma.

 

In the good old days we just went behind the bike sheds and sorted it it that way.

 

I don't think a virtual 2x4 will have the same effect

 

if we had a thread which we could link to when the language gets "fruity" then off we go to that thread and carry on the argument in a place that doesn't hijack a thread.

 

very good idea!

[silverfox1961]

very good idea!

 

I remembered soon after I posted that it's already been done and of course Bookie told me too.

I do agree with what you say about Bookie too. I have read quite a lot of her posts and she is great. A lot of Brits have this stereotypical view of french people but not the national treasure that is Bookworm

[Bookworm]

What, that they are argumentative, loud and resistant to authority? Nah, not me...

[silverfox1961]

What, that they are argumentative, loud and resistant to authority? Nah, not me...

You would never lower yourself

No-Arrogant but I have relatives who are French and they are lovely. Even they say that Parisiens are horrible people. One of my cousins lives in the Chinese quarter and if it wasn't for her job, she'd be gone in an instant. She says that the natives look down on anyone not local. I can't speak personally as I have never been (nor want to go) to Paris.

[Bookworm]

Yes, that's the way French people who are not from Paris also feel. Basically, the rest of France despises Parisians as arrogant snobs and Parisians look down to the rest of the French as uncouth peasants. :-P (I'm from Lyon!!! )

[totiesquoties]

another thing i have experienced, is if you say go to see for e.g. a solicitor, or whatever, some cag members seem to think you are then a solicitor, or whatever you recommend to the op, is this paranoia, or is it because there are solicitors, etc who are cag members? someone thought i was a private investigator just because i mentioned going to one, as i had experience in this field, but am not one, and it was for free advice they give free consultations and free advice over the phone, as do solicitors, i have read this on other posts also caga asking another cag are they are this or a that, any reason why this happens??

[Bookworm]

The paranoia which comes with "talking" to someone who could be anyone, I'm afraid.

 

We do have some law people on site, yes, who give their advice freely on here.

 

We also do have people with vested interests who deliberately pose as someone useful to either tout for business (claim management companies for example), or trap the OP into contacting them (debt collection agencies), then you have the moral high grounders, who think the law is irrelevant if you have a moral obligation (never mind that the companies you're dealing with have no such scruples...) etc, etc... And then you have people who can't accept someone has a different opinion and automatically go on the defensive.

 

In other words, for 10 CAGgers, there could 8 different reasons as to why. You'll go mad if you try to understand it all!!!