Have you been hurt by Debt?

[loopinlouie]

Quite right sillygirl1, I should have thought of that as I was posting it:D

[babybear39]

After thoroughly reading every post (my heart goes out to those of you who have been treated so appallingly), and a few tissues later, I'll tell you some of the worst treatment I've had to put up with from these *****

 

When I got into debt I was was married and we both had excellent paying jobs. Then my husband suffered a severe breakdown and was diagnosed with a severe mental health condition, during which time my mum died. My OH lost his job due to the severity of his illnesses and I was already under a psych. team for some of mine and various other specialists for physical illnesses. But I struggled to work because my OH's insurances for various debts including mortgage were refusing to pay out for ludicrous reasons. I fought them and won some but it all got too much. Our marriage broke up because of this stress and continuous harassment for payments. We sold up and paid off as much as we could.

 

I continued working and lived with my daughter, but the stress got too much and I was forced to give up work due to severe PTSD, agoraphobia, AS, dyspraxia and multiple physical illnesses.

 

In Autumn 2006 DCAs started getting very nasty and I was terrified to answer my phone or open my mail. I told them time and time again that I was registered disabled and longterm ill but they refused to believe this and taunted me with it, saying all manner of things including what another poster has said about me being an unfit mum if I was so disabled and unwell. One DCA even said they would report me to my local social services and I was stupid enough to believe them. Then, in December 2006 I suffered a toxicity syndrome from a reaction between medications and this was potentially fatal. During this time I was receiving threatening calls all the time and was terrified. My Ex was looking after me and answered some of the calls explaining how ill I was. The DCAs promised to note their records to that effect and the abuse stopped for a while.

 

When I'd recovered from the toxicity I decided to apply to university to study for my BA Jounalism as our local one is excellent with support for disabled students. I got my place and started looking forward to a new future.

 

Then the nastygrams and calls started again until I was in such a state I contacted nationaldebtline who gave me great advice and also directed me here TS were also very helpful and took over all dealings with the DCAs. CCCS advised and helped me find a charity to fund my bankruptcy, even supplying a letter of recomdention to the charity. The charity agreed to pay the full cost and I my bankruptcy petition was granted on 1st November 2007. I was so embarassed but the court staff, judge and OR have been great.

 

I'd rather have my health back and pay off those debts but I had no other option as it was making my disabilities and illnesses worse.

 

There is a way out, maybe not for everyone. At least I have a fresh start now...

 

The shame is fading and I'm doing well at university

[montaguegg]

Its difficult to say but I always had to manage the money my OH was self employed and just handed his money over to me at the end of the week,we had debts but they were manageable.

Then the double whammy hit I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer it had been missed in a previous test and was now very serious,OH could not cope and left,so it was just my 19yr old daughter and 2 sons we had very little money and only my elderly parents on pensions to help.

Those 18months to me are a blur ops,radiotherapy and chemo,I believed she was paying the bills.

When I found out she had not I was so angry and thought I did not care I will probably die anyway.

Then I was angry with myself and decided to sort it all out.

I felt really liberated and wrote letters and started paying everyone £20 a week naively I thought this would be ok.

I never really had any problem with Hillesden securities but BC was a nightmare,I was told by Alliance on one occassion to hurry up and pay before I died and on another having asked all sorts of intrusive questions about my finances to use money put by for my funeral,I believed I had to answer their questions.

Mostly its all paid now only one debt is outstanding but I still have sleepless nights and I still feel sick with fear when the doorbell rings or the post comes.

I have found myself ridiculously burst into tears when someone is nice to me or takes time to answer a post.

I think the worst thing is how hard its been for the boys they saw their mum nearly die and at first I did not tell them about the debt but I had to as money is so short we live on £200 a week I pay all my own bills and HS £40 a week sometimes we only have £30 for food etc but they never complain.

My sympathies go out to others who have suffered I do understand.

[babybear39]

montaguegg We're here for you *hugs*

 

Please contact nationaldebtline and CCCS.

[montaguegg]

thanks babybare appreciate the hugs...

 

Am nearly at the end of the long road now..

 

Apart from one debt so soon maybe the sun will shine again

[babybear39]

You're welcome

 

Try calling CCCS for free help and advice. Here's the link and the number's free from a landline too:

 

CCCS - Free Debt Advice from the UK's Leading Debt Charity

 

You shouldn't be paying them that much per week and CCCS will help you with income and expenditure forms and letters for creditors explaining your situation. You shouldn't be struggling so much, you should pay them ONLY what you can afford...

[montaguegg]

now the worst has happened my housing association says that if I di not get rid of my dogs they will evict me...

 

I do not know how to tell my boys they are all they have they sleep with them love them and take care of them

 

the dogs do not do anyone any harm the housing association say people complain about them but they do not do anything and my neighbours say its they have not complained.

 

whats the point anymore I could quite easily end it all now.

[babybear39]

Get straight onto your MP and demand they take this up as an urgent matter. Please don't do anything rash and come here for more advice if you need it *hugs*

[sosumi]

Hi Montaguegg,

Please listen to Babybear. xx

[montaguegg]

ok thankyou

[credit allergy]

This is a great series of threads because debt causes lots of different emotions all of them negative. I have a daughter starting uni in sept. I have sat through all the finance talks and there has not been any lessons learnt about responsible lending whatsoever. Debt is seen as acceptable for an 18 year old with minimal income, if she applied for a car loan how far would she get. Of course I suppose I could have saved for 18 years but of course the goalposts were moved by the government in the form of tuition fees. The point I am making is that the sytem is putting my daughter thousands upon thousands worth of debt by the age of 21 I am concerned. I too am now stronger after a reposession and whilst it is sexist I know, I am full of guilt having let my family down. However I am intending to start a law degree soon, mature students have half paid by uni. When I qualify I have made a personal promise to provide free pro bono advice through debt and advice centres.

[babybear39]

Hi credit allergy

 

I've made a similar promise in that when I finish my Journalism degree I will give as much time as I can to helping others.

[Freda_Bloggs]

In 2000 after years of struggle and 15 years of marriage i walked away with the kids and moved into a housing association house on a council estate which today is in the top 5% of deprivation in the country. we have never been extravagent and both have always worked but there has never been enough at the end of the month to pay for everything. after nearly 18 months of separation we agreed to sell the house pay off everything and go our separate ways we had a crisis with one of the kids and when that was at its highest realised that we needed each other as a family,

over the years we've had ccjs, defaults, highs and lows, taken out consolidation loans and paid everything off then its all built back up again OH was made redundant 2 1/2 years ago after 20 years of solid working... thats it ...13 weeks of £40 odd quid a week and he's got snotty kids at the jobcentre threatening to stop his money (what money?) after about 15 month of him being unemployed we were about a month away from being evicted everything was on the way to court from the council tax to the loans the phone was cut off which was a blessing cos atleast the phone calls stopped the bank charges every month were crippling (got them back thanks to this site) i still worked full time and was putting myself through a degree there was a solicitors company working in the community centre on the estate offering free advice so one day i went in with all the bills sat down and broke down, he took them all wrote letter to all of them worked out a payment plan did all the work and the weight of the world was lifted

5 months later oh got a job and this last christmas was good we still don't have a pot to pee in and theres still no money in the bank the week before pay day but thats us. only last month i was told that after 10 years i am being made redundant in July, and we get a letter from Lowells digging up a debt that i thought was paid off when we sold the house. i have a condition in my brain that means i have increased pressure from too much spinal fluid i am waiting to see if i have to have a shunt fitted to drain away the fluid the tablets i take for the pressure in my brain have depression and insomnia as a side effect i've been battling it for weeks now with the news of my job but this letter from the DCA has just set me back, see in the daytime i have been proactive i have written my letter been strong and fought back but i haven't slept more than 2 hours a night or stopped crying because all the hard work we've put in to put us straight seems to have been for nothing and we'll never be debt free no matter how hard we work

[sosumi]

It takes a hell of a lot of courage to go through what you've been through Freda, and what you're going through. xx

Hope you've posted about this letter from Lowells on the Debt Forums.

[angel_1]

Hiya guys - just found this thread and i thank you all for your comments and advice so far

 

just to let you know ive had a card from Rma for the dreaded visit the other day for monday, oh shucks he didnt turn up blow, i stayed in all day should i now write a complaint for wasting my time ? anyway had a letter from mbna finally who want me to call them to discuss the points raised in my letter ie the offer of reduced payments and being offered as pro rata payments with a listing of all my creditors.

 

I am currently off ill due to depression and seen a private consultant who is now referring me for specialised therapy, so am now wondering if i could actually write to all my creditors who have not accepted the pro rata payments to tell them that due to my illness i find talking on the telephone difficult and that written correspondence is better as i can ask for help and be helped by my councellors at this most difficult time. Continuation of trying to contact me to speak with them on the telephone is not helping me and is causing me distress and confusion for me. Id rather be treated with a little understanding as ive been pro active in addressing my debt rather in hiding behind my mental state at this moment of time.

 

Any one has a letter or point me in the right direction, its been hard to write this but i think i must address it in someway if it helps one more person feeling the same way it s been worth it. Also i guess its helping me to finally confront my own need to get better soon too.

 

Thanks for listening, ciao for now MAZ

[babybear39]

Hi MAZ,

 

Send this: http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/bank-templates-library/37006-harassment-telephone-response-letter.html

 

 

Amend to suit and send recorded post.

[angel_1]

Many thanks babybear39

 

ive clicked on the scales,, too.

 

however, should i also include in my letter that i am vunerable due to my diagnosis, and am awaiting further treatment. Therefore, I would like to be treated fairly and not cause me any undue distress since I have been pro active in trying to address my debt situation with my creditors.

 

How would you put it in the above letter please, many thanks,,,ciao for now MAZ

[babybear39]

You're welcome and thanks MAZ.

 

To be honest, in my experience, the more information you give them about being vulnerable, the nastier they get. The telephone harassment letter should suffice but if they persist, report them to Trading Standards.

[angel_1]

many thanks babybear39

 

i guess you learn to have a pretty hard skin after a while hey

 

will send and again thanks

ciao maz

[babybear39]

Yep MAZ, it certainly helps to develop a hard skin and methodical way of dealing with these *****

[Regulus]

Im 26 years old, and some days I just want to break down and cry. Why is it that these banks are so free to give you their money, but never to assist you when you have trouble. I have been down this road time and time and time again. All ever wanted was to be able to pay my bills, and when I couldn't, be given some freedom until I was in a position to do so again.

 

y'know, when I was 18, I was strong, and fit and healthy. I would play football 2 or 3 times a week, go to the gym 4 times a week, life was good. Then I took out a repayment agreement with Curry's to buy a playstation 2. Now, 8 years later, I am in huge debt, out of work and severely overweight, my father is dying and all my creditors want to know is when I am paying my bill. Give a guy a break please! Its not like I'm trying to avoid paying, I just want the time to find work again and carry on paying. To say I'm in a rut would be an understatment. I hide myself away in a little room in my house and cut off as much contact with the outside worlds as possible. Sad, angry, frustrated, Im all of those things. But I always try to find a reason to laugh too, without it I don't know where I'd be.

 

I hear on the news occasionally about people taking their own lives because of debt worries, and I understand why. I have no interest in going down that route myself, the way I look at it is that worst case scenario is that I am declared bankrupt, lose all my possessions and just start again from scratch, free. Not a bad thing in many ways. But the pressure applied by creditors, DCA's, solicitors, I can understand how it can become too much for some people. Stress is a huge factor on peoples lives, and there is nothing more stressful than a dozen phone calls per day shouting 'where's my money'.

 

If it hasn't happened already, I think its only a matter of time before banks, CCC's, DCA's et al are held accountable for the mental and physical well being of people in Britain. Nothing more than loan sharks with questionable legal backing.

 

The moral of my little story is simple, no matter what your financial burden, the worst that can happen is that it is all taken away form you and you get to start again fresh. You will be alive and debt free. Not such a bad thing in my book. Keep smiling, there is always something to smile about, even in the darkest times.

[HardYards]

Thank you so much for this thread, it's the first I've found that deals with how debt affects people personally.

 

My boyfriend who worked all his life until spondylosis cut short his career, actually had a heart attack thanks to harassment from DCAs (debt collection agencies). Three years, two CAB advisors, and one solicitor later, despite having token payments accepted by all DCAs, he still has trouble with companies like Lowell. I deal with all his debts, and sometimes I have really struggled emotionally (I have ME/CFS and also manage clinical depression).

 

What has helped is legal advice The Directory - Find a legal adviser)

 

having a solicitor put most of his creditors off writing all the time/selling on the debt.

 

- changing our telephone number and not giving it out to any DCA (Lowell has tried to get it by refusing to deal with me when I ring them, saying they can only talk to me if they can ring back). Now I do not deal with any of them over the telephone.

 

- most importantly, through brilliant websites like this one and Martin Lewis's money site, getting to know our rights.

 

By the by I recently complained in writing to Lowell saying that I was also going to complain to the OFT, and guess what? They've stopped sending harassing letters.

 

What also helped was that last year, during Remembrance time, I watched a lot of documentaries on WWI. I saw how cheaply the government treated life at that time, as they do now. I realised that the powers that be have never valued the people who keep them going, i.e. us. And I resolved at that moment that whatever it took, I was never going to let the actions of DCAs (or anyone else) to make me feel bad again.

 

The other thing, and I tell all DCAs this, is that due to my ill-health, I refuse to deal with them all the time. I do all the payments during the third week of the month, and I don't write to any of them at any other time unless they threaten to take my boyfriend to court.

 

To the people on this thread who have considered suicide or are otherwise struggling because of debt, please, please, please, don't let these jackals ruin or take away your life. Please get in touch with your doctor if you are feeling suicidal (I have been there, I know how hard it is but they are there to help you). I wanted to kill myself two years ago but now I am so glad I didn't.

 

There is always a way. There is lots of good advice on this website and others. There is always help. And life changes, you can't always see how it will, but things do get better. Like other people have said, taking the bull by the horns always makes me feel better and in control.

 

I wish the best of everything to everyone, and all the best of luck to you who are re-training as mature students!

 

Take care.

 

Oh yes, I have a big collection of inspiring quotes I keep to bolster my spirit. If anyone would like a copy please feel free to PM me.

[willtheywontthey]

The financial institutions are getting away with extremely unfair practice and that is putting it kindly. I always panicked and worried myself whenever I got a reminder for my credit card that I'd not paid on time. They added charges which made it worse. I kept moving debt from one card to the other (remember how easy that was! Remember those cheques they gave us as well!) I ended up on CAG and realised I could claim charges back. That helped but I almost regret doing so as there were so many charges which would have assisted me later on when the situation worsened.

 

I then started getting calls and more and more letters saying payments late (a day or two late!!). This was the start of the credit crunch and they must have known what was coming as they all started their 'panic' approach. They all started chasing and sent threatening letters when in the very recent past they used to increase credit limit or offer cheques!

 

This annoyed me. I learnt about making a sar request. Sent these first and then afterwards sent for a cca (that order really helped me) and found most ccas were useless. They even started compiling them (ie making them up saying they were allowed to) but these were not on my SArs. The banks definitely started acting 'hostile' as soon as the cca and sars were sent. I stopped paying the ones which I thought did not have enforceable cca and were being hostile (being unfair to put it simply). I am paying those with ccas and those with dodgy ccas who were decent to me. I simply could not afford to pay anymore as the interest was crippling me - could hardly pay just that. I thought well it does not say anything about rate of interest on my credit card 'agreement' so why should I pay them! It's a bit like buying a tv for £300 and then being told after I had taken it home I had to pay £200 extra just because they said so! then maybe somebody else would come along and ask for £100 - just because.

 

They can threaten and they do. It will get you down. BUT since I stopped paying and started using these letters and advice on here I do not get much hassle. It's not every day I dread the post anymore. I get much less post. I do need to be more 'on the ball' in case something escalates but I come on CAG and get wonderful advice. I do not panic as much. I pay my mortgage and the credit cards can go jump until they provide me with proof the debt is enforceable etc.

 

One major avenue that assisted me was Truecall. I don;t get any calls now. Did get some to work and got loads at home. It will happen. You need to be ready to fight, to write letters here and there and to know when to ignore unimportant letters from DCAs mailing lists. The colour red is not urgent and usually comes to mean 'ignore them they're trying to pull a fast one'!

 

It can get very confusing on CAG - I still get lost after 2 years but it's a lifesaver. Don't always follow first bit of advice you get though (no offence people) but read about a bit and find 'best fit' for your situation. Different DCAs act differently.

 

I am almost starting to enjoy life again. I am almost looking forward to the Xmas rush of postcards and pretty colour letters from DCAs so that I can respond accordingly and in the manner befitting such correspondence during the festive season. The elfs get busy at this time - be prepared but don't get down. It makes for a funny Xmas day usually on CAG!

 

The FOS are useless in making decisions - take 2+ years and then decision is a load of watered down rubbish. Still worth using as it causes DCAs hassle.

 

SAR is a good device but expensive. I'd use this if you have not done so yet. Use with all OCs in particular - even if not in dispute yet.

 

the cca route is a trusted one but the OCs in particular fob us off on this and make a document up because they 'can'. that could be a good sign they have not got one but remember they could always find one! the SAR should have been a good indicator of what they actually have which is why I always asked for that first... before I started having problems and they were not guarded in what they sent. ICO is useless at doing anything if anything missing from SAR other than telling OC / DCA to comply. No fine nothing.

 

So - chin up. There's many in same position. Post your thoughts, concerns and do not panic. easy to say but it's true! Nobody can take your money except a court!!!

[Adams girlfriend]

Hi all

This is my first posting, so bare with me.

In 2006, after 7 years of getting into debt all because I wanted a great 30th birthday party (in 1999) and loads of people gave me loads of money on credit cards, I suffered a nervous breakdown because of debt and the chasers!! My Dad also passed away at the beginning of the year, so that just added to it even more. My husband knew nothing of my debts (he does now) that I had built up (£40,000 in total) and so I used to do the hiding letters etc and phone calls - pretending not to hear the person on the other end of the phone. In the end, I thought people would be better off without me and I tried to take an overdose! Luckily I am still here to tell this tale and my husband now knows everything and we're still together. I was always afraid that he would leave me if he ever found out about my debts, but when he did, he stood by me and I think it's made us just that little be stronger - if we can sort this, we can sort anything!

 

In February 2006, we visited an Insolvency agent, who were really helpful in getting us sorted out. We totalled up EVERY debt we had, including the mortgage. It all came to approx £70,000. Once we had an IVA in place (Individual Voluntary Arrangement) rather than going bankrupt, it was nearly all plain sailing from there. We struggled a tiny bit to get a re-mortgage, but in the end the one that came up trumps was Kensington. We borrowed a little more than we needed, as part of the agreement was that we got a new roof on the house and got central heating installed, as it was beginning to be uninhabitable!! In the last 3 years and 2 months, we've defaulted on the mortgage twice - both times was not our fault, it was due to my employers making a mistake and paying my wages into the bank late. Kensington have been really good about this and we were assured that as long as the mortgage was paid at their next request, it wouldn't go on our credit record (which we have spent 3 years building up).

 

I had a blip in my IVA, as EGG were part of my debtors and they wouldn't take no for an answer that I still didn't owe them £3,255.45. It took me another 12 months to get them to admit that I didn't owe it.

 

So the moral of my story is, no matter how much debt you are in, please don't think that ending it all is a way out, as there is always light at the end of the tunnel!

[flaminscoty]

Hi all on the forum!

went to colchester county court yesterday to set aside a charging order going on my house from dca "stink financial" this has been going on for nearly a year now on me chinstrap and feal like ****!

The only way we are going to stop the b******s if we all get together and get the law changed! because today I feel that were justice is concearned "Justice is like the worst kind of hooker and you only get what you pay for" and that is a price I cant afford to pay!

For all of you out there suffering here is my little thought for the day

"alone we are but a grain of sand but together we can hold back an ocean!!"

Flaminscoty

Edited May 13, 2010 by flaminscoty
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