Funny, I Dont Think So !

[bazak1]

1-WHY IS A SQUARE PIECE OF BREAD CALLED A "ROUND".

2-IF YOU FIND A MISSING LINK, HOW DO YOU KNOW WHERE IT GOES.

3-IF YOU MOVE YOUR HEAD TO AND FRO REALLY QUICKLY IN FRONT OF A MIRROR, WILL YOU EVER CATCH YOURSELF LOOKING THE OTHER WAY.

4- IF YOU REALLY DO CATCH A COLD, WHY NOT MOVE OUT OF THE WAY AND LET SOMEONE ELSE CATCH IT.

DOES ANYONE ELSE HAVE ANYMORE ??

[bazak1]

why are they called flats. why not "TALLS"

[Rooster-UK]

Where are the four corners of the globe?

[Lula]

why is it called birth control and not conception control?

[Castlebest]

What is the difference between flammable and inflammable ?

[Rooster-UK]

What's a male ladybird called?

[pinkduchess]

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

[Robertxc]

Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons?

[bazak1]

If a pilot light on your cooker or fire goes out, how come you never see it coming back in again

[bazak1]

If you run round and round really really fast, will you catch yourself up

[bazak1]

imagine this.

a slug travels for three weeks to get across your garden from one side to the other.

What happens if he then remembers he left the gas on !

What a b*g**r

[HSBCrusher]

those signs on shop doors that say "guide dogs only"

 

who is supposed to read it?

[PKea]

those signs on shop doors that say "guide dogs only"

 

who is supposed to read it?

 

The normally sighted people who try to walk in with their dogs.

[Guest wino]

Read on a packet of sleeping tablets WARNING May cause drowsiness:confused:

[PKea]

Here are a few more:

 

 

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible:

 

Do not use while sleeping – on Sears hair dryer.

Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!

 

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside – on a bag of Fritos.

The shoplifter special!

 

Directions: Use like regular soap – on a bar of Dial soap.

And that would be how?

 

Serving suggestion: Defrost – on some Swann frozen dinners.

But it's just a suggestion!

 

Fits one head – on a hotel provided shower cap in a box.

The big one or the little one?

 

Do not turn upside down – on the bottom of Tesco's Tiramisu dessert box.

Too late! You lose!

 

Product will be hot after heating – on Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding.

Are you sure??? Let's experiment.

 

Do not iron clothes on body – on packaging for a Rowenta iron.

But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?

 

Do not drive car or operate machinery – on Boot's Children's cough medicine.

We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.

 

Warning: may cause drowsiness – on Nytol sleep aid.

One would hope!

 

Warning keep out of children – on a Korean kitchen knife.

Or pets! What's for dinner?

 

For indoor or outdoor use only – on a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights.

As opposed to use in outer space.

 

Not to be used for the other use – on a Japanese food processor.

Now I'm curious.

 

Warning: contains nuts – on Sainsbury's peanuts.

But no peas?

 

Instructions: open packet, eat nuts – on an American Airlines packet of nuts.

Have a lobotomy

 

Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals – on a Swedish chainsaw

What is this, a home castration kit?

 

Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly – on a child's Superman costume.

That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!

[pwynn]

Roflmao PKea......that really has brightened up my day!!!!

[pinkduchess]

swedish chainsaw & japanese food processor!! - very funny

[bazak1]

If you didnt catch a falling star, would it have hit the floor and burst into a thousand pieces.

this is the best one. i woke in bed the other night and when i turned the light on, my shadow had only got in with me. i gestured to it to get out, but it lay there imitating me.

[bazak1]

One for the kids.

why do two odd numbers make an even, yet two even numbers make an even too.

Shhh, no-one tell 'em

[bazak1]

Why do people stand in the CENTRE of the supermarket aisle to talk

[kia]

think that one might be on wrong thread bahh humbug me thinks :Dxxkia

[bazak1]

just funny little things that make life what it is.

[jansus]

when a house burns why is it "raised" to the ground?

[bazak1]

good question.

did you notice that when you were 16 or 17 and looked in the mirror every day, and now you're a lot older and look, you are different, that you didnt actually notice that change happening. it isnt until you look at old photos of yourself and think " i dont remember going from that, to how i look now". ".

[angelone]

when they say its raining men..how come none of them are good looking.