Hi Emmzii, yeah agree with you there, very angry about her treatment. So, how would be advised she proceed since she never wants to go back? She wants to quit rather than the gross misconduct thing. She's considering writing an email, requesting to quit rather than being dragged into the disciplinary, and negotiate not serving her notice period (compensate with sacrificing annual leave) or something?

Hi Emmzzi, my wifes aware she has done something wrong. She apologised for it. But my point was that surely thats not proportionate in response if other employees are assigned a must lesser response for what i'm sure people would judge as a more severe act. But agreed, can forget about that. The misconduct is just that. But gross misconduct? I can't believe all of the discussed above is considered okay and not in breach of employment law, very disappointed. This person is awful. And I also don't understand, all the reading I've done into this indicates things like that their time with the company and previous conduct should be taken into account. You don't seem to think so? We're happy with her leaving, but I'd rather not have her suffer the indignity of the disciplinary hearing. She's not emotionally able to go through it. She has a few weeks of leave and a month of notice. But she never wants to go back. If she quits now can she avoid the disciplinary?

What about the point on fairness and consistency? surely it is un-proportional in response, and more of a performance effecting issue that requires a warning etc etc. How can bullying be forgiven with a slap on the wrist, and this writing notes (just to be clear this wasn't "work" this was just notes on thoughts while working) incident is grounds for gross-misconduct? Even the warning for all the employees on internet usage has not been followed up? This is time that she has not claimed for? and explained that at the first chance she was given. She had no outstanding tasks at the time, but was told in the meeting after she could "have gone and found some".

Hi Emmzzi, thanks for the response. Nope, when she was discovered at her machine writing the notes by her manager was the first time she was ever warned about it, the next day she was taken into a meeting room and told it constituted gross misconduct and that the disciplinary hearing is next week.

Will do Conniff. Hilly, in answer to your points. Surely though, the manager warning is proof it's not a dismissible offence? If she wasn't even telling her that at the time, that means the manager is not aware of it. It sounds petty, pointing at other employees. I was more trying to state this response was not consistent or fair, and that would point to discriminatory in my mind. She would happily admit the truth, she was writing some personal notes, but considering she had worked an extra 30minutes on that day alone, she considered it part of that time. The manager did not even ask for her side of the story at the time. I don't understand how this could be considered gross misconduct, breach of trust? I know gross misconduct circumvents performance, but her record etc has not been taken into account at all. Her performance has never been in question, there has been no warning. I can't see how this could constitute gross-misconduct, when theft and bullying (which is always cited as an example of gross misconduct) fail to. Surely that's not fair or consistent? But disproportionate and discriminative?

Thanks for this. Apologies! that was ambiguous, my wife's hobby is creative writing, so it was notes on storyline etc, totally innocent. Nothing even slightly offensive/inflammatory. I've discussed this with my wife, ideal outcome I don't know, she can't work there anymore, she's devastated. I was concerned I wouldn't be able to attend, I'm not a colleague. But she's not in a fit state to argue her position. They knew that. It's a company of 20 people, so no union, and colleague would be to afraid for their own positions to assist.

My wife, has been threatened with gross misconduct, suspended and has a pending disciplinary hearing/meeting. She has been informed verbally (not written yet), that this was regarding an incident where her manager saw her writing private notes at work (in a work document, which they said was her deliberately hiding it), her manager then screamed at her humiliating her in front of her colleagues, and warned her doing it again would be her out. She has possibly written personal notes prior to this, never altogether more than 2 pages, her notebook was once found by her manager which she had left in the office after lunch (a result of writing in lunchtimes), and was left on her desk by her manager without any warning or questions. My wife sent her an apology email. Next day she was called into a meeting with her managers manager, where she was informed that her machine was being investigated, due to this incident, they didn’t know what the decision would be from here but he has declared this to be a gross misconduct. He even stated that he was happy with her performance in her role, and couldn’t believe she’d written personal notes in hours, that he was disappointed and that it was gross misconduct. I’m yet to know what the staff handbook contains. She is yet to be told what the outcome of this is, she hasn’t been dismissed for gross misconduct yet. There have been no warnings about this, she has never been caught doing it before etc. Her performance is immaculate, she was one of the only people to have her pay increased this year and get employee of the month, she has numerous emails reflecting this and has worked with the company for 4 years. This has never hindered her performance; she out-performs everyone that works there. This was literally her manager seeing her write something personal, screaming at her in front of everyone, and then being informed this WAS gross misconduct. Even on that day (provable), she worked 30minutes extra to what she has been paid and this was essentially done in that time. It’s a moderately small company, my wife is of ethnic decent, female and married a year ago, her manager made reference the management (manager’s manager) to her not getting more responsibilities since she might get pregnant (non provable, all verbal) in her appraisal... He’s made some horrible comments in the past (the managers manager, which I wont go into right now unless you’d like to hear them) again verbal, non provable (even one, a couple of years ago regarding them sponsoring her visa, when my wife requested to know whether they would sponsor her visa for the next year, that she needed to know, he responded that, “if she told him what to do he’d send her home” (paraphrased). It’s also important to note that mid 2012, another employee was discovered to have stolen company property, his training records. This employee was perhaps disciplined (unknown) but left of his own accord Jan 2013. Also, importantly one year ago, my wife was publicly bullied in the office by a colleague (in front of her colleagues), this was recorded officially, and the person may have been disciplined (unknown), but they continue to work there even now, and was not grounds for gross misconduct. There was a warning from HR on behalf of her managers manager, stating that there was a high internet usage in office hours by employees and this was not acceptable and if anyone was found to be using the net in excess would be liable for a penalty (financial). There has been no warning about not making personal notes. People continue to use the internet for personal use, managers manager acknowledged this in the meeting and said “that’s different..” Would this constitute gross misconduct? She no longer feels she can work at this place, she’s emotionally fragile and has been humiliated on several occasions. Is this constructive dismissal. Is this proportionate and consistent when they have excused bullying (the bullying was recorded against my wife, and the person still works there…) and theft in the past? How can I collect evidence? Do we have a right to access her emails etc.? At the disciplinary meeting, what can I do (I plan to attend..) what rights do I have to request information? Can I request any? Can I record the meeting? Can I request a similar investigation to be done on a colleague machine (to detect whether this is discriminatory?). Should I declare I intend to take this to employment tribunal? Thanks in advance for any responses. Help would be wildly appreciated. Kind regards Nathan