It isnt a great thing to have to worry about all these things. I am sure someone on this site will offer some great advice. Priority debts need to be sorted first; Rent/Mortgage, Council Tax, Utility - Dont quote me as I do not know the legal points around this; but Overdrafts, catalouge, card debts are not priority. I would sit down and work out exactly what your priority debts and living costs are, deduct from your income. Look at all your cards, loans overdrafts etc, list them all, starting from the highest interest charging ones, think what and which ones to work out a realistic monthly payment, dont overpay what you cant afford. I would consider not using the cards etc, as you will be adding to your debt and problems. I would contact someone Like Stepchange or Citizens advice, they will offer you some very good advice and ways of contacting your companies you have debt with. Dont be afraid of your debt companies, write to the fully explaining situation and what you can realistically offer, do not be preasurised into paying more than you can I personally prefer contact by post or e mail rather than telephone. Ive no idea what Factor, Monzo is, but may well fall in line with what Ive said. Keep a note in a diary of every call you made or who contacted you, ask for names, keep and copy all letters to and from as this may be helpfull further down the line for record keeping. Do not ignore contact as this just adds more stress for you and the problem wont go away. Make sure you make your affordable monthly payments, every month, even if they say we wont accept it, its to low. As you have a lot of stress going on, I would certainly contact someone like Stepchange or Citizens advice, Good luck

hy, In a nutshell; - current contract work part time Mon to Fri 24 hrs - Unpaid year off break to become family member full time carer - Need to either go back to work at end of next month, start of July or leave - Application for Transfer was turned down - Letter to go in this week with a application form to request change of contract, hrs, days so that I can look after family member - change requested will be work mon, tues, wed but not more than 13.5hrs or 14, then breaks deducted to stay within legal earnings limit as carers allowance is received - it is not possible to work thur, fri sat, sun due to care needs and travelling for adult disabled family member Ive done a bit of digging, I can send application for reduction of the hrs and contract which i think the govt said I can legally do. Doesnt mean the company has to be bound legally by it. It may be that it isnt suitable and there for ask me to resign. Or they may agree! Or terminate my employment. But as I am a full time family carer for a family member within the same household, I should have a good case to argue. Caring for family adult learning disability; full time, currently unpaid from work, unpaid carer - receive weekly carers allowance This is what I have searched on so far; - can only receive from employment £132 a week, after Tax, NI, deductions in all about £201.00 a week, but this is taxable and needs to be entered on tax submission, but if less than personal allowance then no tax may be paid? - I believe NI is paid as long as you get the carers allowance, although gap between break in employment and start of carers allowance may not be? -Should employment end due to company not happy in change of hrs and I have to leave, then only the carers allowance would for be the income, If UC is applied for would this allowance be deducted from what UC give or the person I cared for be affected - Savings may affect if you get UC or not - Certainly cant be available for looking for work as full time carer anyone have any points, help or advice on this issue please Does anyone have any further knowledge or experience of this to advice me, what legal or other rights, but if I quit or asked to quit, would claiming benefits as such be suspended for quitting a job, thanks

@mantis shrimp thank you, your input and advice is very much appreciated. I really wish we were not in this position, but we are.

thank you @ mantis shrimp. Yes I understand I manage it all, in his best interest as I do as Appointee for DWP. I dont do anything unless we have had a very good talk and explained why something has to be done or if he wants to do something, Ill explain yes you can do that or no I wouldnt advise that. Eg, when he wanted to give some ornamental objects to people and to charity shop, he said you can sort it. I explained it doesnt belong to me, Its all yours, but Ill help you do what you want to do. Again it was a Yes you can, or no you cant with full explanation.

Hy so sorry indeed. Made a complete hash of things. You do not need to apologise, @mantis shrimp I was trying to put it into a scenario, that I didnt have to say who we were, in case other people read it and thought my brother was loaded. To start, Dad died, two sons left. Me and brother. My brother was reliant on my father for 45 years, lived with mum and dad. Last year I had to leave my family and work, unpaid leave. To come or go up north to look after him. Physically he is ok, he does have understanding, issues like this, i explain very carefully and simply as I can and other more important issues. We have spoke about the DOV and the issues surrounding it. He has always said for many years that mum and dad should have left the home to me or us. But I guess they just thought it was somewhere for him to live. We are both Executors and Trustee, Probate has confirmed this. However as you have said, all it does apart from being a beneficiary for specific legacies, is made me a kind of manager of everything for brother. I own everything, but all belongs to brother. He wants to ensure that when we do move up to care for him at least I have security in home and wont get kicked out. I hope this clarifies the situation now, sorry for my clumsy way of trying to get this across. But I do value your input or anyone else's, has some help is better than no help. And £1000 to £2000 cost is a lot when it could go to much needed repairs.

I agree. That is why, exact drafting of DOV taking into account of wording. However both parties are in full agreement, so time would be reduced, no sticky bits to sort. With support, advice and help, it may well be possible to do, without full Legal input. I will look at the forms. templates etc. to see if this is an easy option. Even just getting everything printed, signed sorted , then seeing a solicitor. Further research, phone calls to be made.

Thanks for all the help. 1] First port of call, see a solicitor/legal advice. Try for 30 mins free bit. 2] Im glad you mentioned Deed of Variation. From my research into this, am I right in thinking, that the person who owns the property, can decide they want to share the property with someone who they want to benefit for as though it had been re written in the will in the first place. 3] Time scale, has to be done within 2 years of date of death. It takes 2 to 4 weeks, as its prety much straight forward , no complications. all in agreement to sign. It does mean between £1000 and £2000 + VAT. [using solicitors] 4]It can be done without legal drafts, but wording, preperation needs to be legally water tight. It can not be undone or changed once it has been done. Has anyone any thoughts on this or any experience or knowledge in, prep and drafting a DOV any help appreciated many thanks

Hy, can anyone help with the following please; Property as in home. From my understanding of the following. 1] The appointment of named people as Executors and Trustees of the will, are the ones to sort out the wishes of the will and to make sure the wishes are done. so for example; Fred and Flora surviving son and daughter of Gilbert the father who died. Fred acts as main executor and Trustee as Fred has learning disability issues. 2] I GIVE DEVISE AND BEQUEATH all my real and personal estate of whatsover..........to my Trustees upon trust to sell call in etc....... "real estate" means home. So is it my understanding that Gilberts home, now belongs to both Fred and Flora as both are the Trustees, as stated in sec 1. Furthermore if both the trustees wanted to sell the property they can do so. 3] MY TRUSTEES shall hold the net proceeds of such sale........ a] Upon trust to pay thereout all my just debts, legacies, funeral .... expenses b] Upon trust absalutely for my wife..... [she died before the dad] c] Upon trust absolutely for my daughter Flora Can I assume that this is referring to a pecking order for surving family members to sort out issues in sec 1 and 2. So, back to the property, Probate has been granted and Fred and Flo are the legal executors of the will. Overall does the property belong legally to both Fred and Flora to live in now. As being the trustees, they hold or have possession of the legal title to it. Or looking at sec 3, Does the property only belong to Flora? and not Fred. Note; a] If property belongs to Flora only and in the future, is placed into care, the council will take the property, sell it, use the money to pay towards care, Flora will have some of it. b] If property belongs to both Fred and Flora, then legally I dont think the council can take the property then to sell and pay towards the care, as Fred has to live there and I wouldnt think making him homeless is a good thing Anyone have any notes or points of fact for me please. Many thanks

Thats another question, problem I have is At present the home is in dads name [deceased] I haven't changed the title deeds yet, i have the will, I think it may be left to my brother, but it says to my trustees as named in first part, well that is me, brother and mum, but she passed long before dad, further down it says something like personal and real estate, to brother? My brother does not want to leave family home he's lived in all his life, neither do we. I am prepared to look after him by moving up there with him, that is what he wants, i am not turning my back on him and the SW ends up putting him in care and taking the property

thanks @honeybee13 any idea of residency time if caring for someone in family home, there is a lot going on at moment, as he cant be left on his own, i brought him down with me for xmas and new year, wont be back up north for next week or so

Hy, I have been caring for my brother in the family home since July last year. Full time unpaid, I am planning to leave my current home and work to move in permanently, how long is it that a family member can be classed as living there, if at some point brother is put into care, as at that point id be classed as homeless if the council take the property to pay for the care. Im sure I read somewhere that they cant take the property if you are or have been living there as a carer. Advice on this issue please. Other than waiting for carers allowance application, what benefits or financial assistance can I get, as at present I am on unpaid leave from work.

yes Honeybee13, But ill need to sort the outstanding bills and urgent bathroom repair, to ensure brother stays in property

Hy Update. dad, very poorly, but hanging on. Could be next few days, sooner or early next week. I phoned HRT for advice, not a lot they can say, until dad passes. But If the banks released the money [death cert etc stuff] then more than likely wont need to apply probate. It depends on what the levels are for the banks. If not then, probate. They said its form IHT205 and PA1 for the probate, can down load or they send me. If I do have to probate, i send these forms and all other papers to probate address.

Note: This thread has been started by Yorky55 and some posts have been moved from another thread. Both threads have been tidied. HB hy, It comes under Durham. Up date; dad was fast tracked 2 days ago to Nursing home. He went to nursing home yesterday. Is very frail and poorly. They say its a case of hrs or so not days or so. OK, Im trying to get things prepared before I leave, as no internet up north. Question, IHT, I printed off a lengthy IHT form. IHT205. Now; 1] The total of estate after estimates and actuals takeaway what's owed, will be far less than 100,000.00, probably about 80,000.00. I assume the cost of funeral, outstanding bills, insurance, will come out of this figure or not. 2] Do I need to send IHT, if so which one? and I use this for Probate? Does the probate costs come from this IHT valuation. 3] The urgent repairs costs, does this come out of valuation 4] Missing items, cant value them? now, then will have to pack and go, no internet. Can you offer help as soon as poss please, as just waiting for phone cal lMany thanks for your help I forgot to ask; For the funeral costs and expenses etc, will the banks, let me have some or do I have to wait for probabte?

Ok as of this moment. Hospital just phoned, dad will be moved to Nursing home very near the there bungalow village. Either to day or tomorrow. He isnt to good, not responsive, not eating or drinking, refuses, very agitated, confused. obviously skin and bone now. Another nurse will phone me in an hr time to give me more details and SW name?? My understanding is, that NHS continuation of care extending to Nursing home EOL care plan, started whilst in hospital, there should be no cost. I dont think we have that long to go now. when the time comes, and i get a call, I will leave to go up north, arrange funeral etc and sort paperwork, sort Probate, try to get the re[pairs done, look after my brother, I will have 2 months off work [unpaid] longer if needed. I need to do a load of paperwork, before I send to probate. Im trying to sort out the home bills at moment. not paid since feb 2021. brother is still getting sorted with his PIP stuff and benefit, I was supposed to get a copy of the assessment, which I still havnt had yet.

hy, not sure if made myself clear, dads SW isnt in hospital, I meant to say I need to find out who the allocated SW is, reference to Hospital SW for discharge into care home. NO one has told me who it is?

hy honeybee13 thanks for virtual hug. Everything is a nightmare at moment. Dad did have an apointed SW, but hes been in hospital for last few weeks, I believe he isnt classed as self funding! he was never in care home longer than 6 weeks. I agreed with the Hospital DR, over week ago, for EOL and palliative care to start all the tubes and medical intervention to stop, he isnt eating and drinking. will have to contact SW on what happens, need to find the nursing home closer to where my brother lives, Dad was expected to go this week [pass away] because of this, my applications for court access to finances etc, ive put on hold. As the will and probate will kick in, cant see dad lasting another week or so?

OK UP DATE. As of today, I have been notified that the hospital/ward, are wanting my father discharged into a nursing home type place. They are no longer doing any medical intervention, he is on EOL Palliative care, dad no longer eat or drink but they say he needs 24hr nursing care. Trying to get through to ward and will have to find one. If dad is having NHS care in hospital, then if he goes into nursing home, is that considered continuation of care, so wont have to pay or do we have to pay or is it same as care home, we have 6 weeks before paying? They expected dad to not survive the week, but looks like he may be longer, but dont think it will be like weeks? Any suggestions please

Hy everyone. Thankyou indeed for all your input. Update; Unfortunately I think the decision is now taken out my hands. Have spent the last week in toutch with the Drs and ward staff, we had a call on Friday to say we needed to see dad asap. A 8 hr trip there and back, very tiring especially when I cant drive. Spent several hrs with dad. left at about 1am. He is in a side room now, very ill. Just sleeping and no recognition at all. We got a call latter part of Sunday to agree to EOL care, start of Palliative care and removal of the drips, other than a glucose one for comfort. There is very little they can do for dad now. WE just have a matter of days now. I will now have to focus my attention on the support and care of my younger brother and the home. I guess the ne,xt stage is Probate. Do I get a form or contact them when time comes, I think it is going to cost over £200 and could take up to 8 weeks.

Interesting. Good Sister. 1] how do I attatch the COP3 form to the e mail. I dont know how to do video call?

Ok update, I just sent e mail with copy of the PALS complaint to COP asking for help and advice, regarding having to travel 6 to 7hrs , i cant drive, someone will have to take me, to hand in a form COP3 to the ward staff, as Matron insists that someone physically sees me Ive asked in the e mail, if COP can contact matron/ward about form, so I dont have to travel. It will mean time off from work,not paid as its to far to do when finished.

Hy, UP date. I e mailed, to PALS at weekend, also follow up with a letter, I also have detailed letter ready to send to DWP, for appointee and court. Just had a phone call from Ward Matron, basically, I have to physically go to the ward, so they can seem in person, before they fill out or sign form. I explained im in northampton, hospital is in Stockton, Id have to have more time off from work, its a long journey as I cant drive. Question is this the case, or can I do it another way. She gave me her e mail at hospital if I can send the form, whats the point if you still got to physically see me. I spoke to staff nurse this afternoon, dad is very poorly, refuses, food, drink, very dilerious and confused, refuses medication, has IV fluis, rather flat today, pulled out his canulas, she spent 45 mins with him and says very poorly. anyone have any ideas who and what I can do about the roody form, Im ready to give up myself now.

Ok update. I have spent the last week or two, trying to get help from the Staff Nurses and Matron, regarding the Consultant or someone to have my dads lack of capacity documented, either their own paperwork or me sending COP3. I they have informed the consultant looking after my dad, who at this moment is sounding very ill, with medical issues on top of delirium and confusion, he is apparently having blood transfusion bag things. not eating and drinking. I have even spoken to the consultants secretary to explain the urgent matter and to have the consultant contact over the last few days WITHOUT SUCCESS, conversion ended today with its a legal form can I take it into hospital personally, er..I dont drive and Im in Northampton, Hospital is Stockton on Tees. the nurses cant help need to speak to consultant!!!!!!! conversation ended with well I will complain to PALS, GMC secretary of Health or whoever......reply was looks like it then? I have just compiled a 3 page letter [well e mail one] sent to PALS, I will follow up with a written one and to whoever else I can contact. I need this medical form before I can do anything else with court or appointee anyone have any ideas cos Im now at my gasping point, wondering why the hell am I taking on all this stress and worry, then I think of my younger brother, and that reminds me why I am doing it and doing it for.

Ok, update, I have phoned last couple of days to ward asked to speak to Staff Nurse, they said the consultant would get back to me, they were not sure if they had such an assessment form. I got the name of consultant but its a 2 weekly change over. Last night I gave the SN my address details etc, they said there would be a team meeting this morning and someone would get back to me or if I need to send them COP3. Low and behold its gone 8 now and nothing. I am up at crack of dawn at work till early lunch time, its hot Im tired, Im on phone most of day with young brother helping him, so i think Im just about had enough. They visited dad today, 1 person at time now. still confused pushing food away. I have worry of the bills mounting up, the repair needed doing etc. Will phone ward tomorow, Ill try to find out secretary of the consultant at Stockton Hospital. Age UK wasnt really much help, as Im doing everything they sugested already? Yes a complaint to PALS is next step. Will write to DWP enclose form and explain situation that I cant get anyone to do a ssessment form?

Cant get through to ward...again! Maybe think of a Complaint via PALS I dont even know address to contact for the Hospital Social worker! I think it is Durham County Council? so annoying I cant get through to anyone?